What is real coffee? That’s what I ask you today. As a Master Spokane Coffee Roaster, I’m a bit passionate about this, so please forgive me, because I’ve been putting this post off long enough. My wife Alisha, God bless her pea picking soul, drinks what I call a Liquid Candy Bar every morning. We’re talking, 2 shots of espresso, 2 tablespoons of chocolate, 2 tablespoons of caramel, a cup of milk, and an ounce of 40% cream. Oh my, I’m getting a sugar high just writing about it.
Liquid Candy Bar
AND she’s not alone. Millions of Americans drink sugar-n-milk concoctions every day. Don’t get me wrong. These Liquid Candy Bars are good. Really good. But, what bugs me is that everyone calls these drinks “coffee”. Now before I go any further, I have to preface any further comments with this statement. Drink What You Like, whether it’s real coffee or just a liquid candy bar with a little bit of coffee in it.
Real Coffee?
That being said, a liquid candy bar isn’t Real Coffee. That ain’t coffee at all. It’s a Liquid Candy Bar. I
n fact most drive thrus make these coffee concoctions so sickeningly sweet, that you can’t for the life of you taste the coffee. Right here in Spokane Washington, we have a slew of coffee drive thrus called “Dutch Brothers”, who sell these drinks like there’s no tomorrow.
I’ll admit, I have a sweet tooth too, but let’s call a spade-a-spade. If you can’t taste the coffee, then it’s NOT real coffee. I don’t have to tell you how sugar totally screws up your body. If you’re an American and you’re fat, then I’ll bet dollars to donuts, that you’re fat because you eat too much sugar. And I’m pointing my finger mostly at myself.
Comfort Food
So, if you want a truly soul satisfyingly comfort food, then drink coffee straight. I’ll even go out on a limb here and say, “Real Men Drink It Black”. Now that I’ve gotten that off my chest, go back to drinking your Liquid Candy Bar, but for God’s sake, don’t call it coffee!!!
I apologize for the rant. Don’t anyone tell my wife that I’ve been talking about her. And don’t you dare tell her that I said people who drink Liquid Candy Bars are fat. She’ll kick my butt.
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